Updated: Apr 26
#Relationshipgoals has become an iconic saying in the last few years. It is primarily used to indicate a relationship worth having. A signifier that a particular relationship aspect is to be sought after. It is something to work towards in the realm of dating/marriage.
With that, most of us who are in a relationship feel the pressure to measure up to to a certain standard that we see represented by those around us and on social media sites. Unfortunately though, this standard might not be the proper standard to measure ourselves by. #relationshipgoals is mainly conjured up by the culture we live in. A culture that values things that are often times counter than what our God values.
Growing up, I found myself in multiple relationships that were unhealthy and in no way centered around God. In fact, they were most often centered around lust, selfishness and pride. This is due, partly because of my sin nature, but also because of the standard I measured myself too. It was the wrong standard and was often what I saw on Instagram or at my school. Whatever relationship I saw that looked "happy" I mimicked its practice. Whatever my friends felt was appropriate for their relationships, I did too. This is the path most of us walk down - measuring our morality against those around us instead of by God and His Word. As Christians, we are called to lean more into what He says and thinks and steer away from following what the culture feels (Rom. 12:2)
What God Says a Relationship Should Be.
1 Corinthians 10:31 talks about glorifying God in everything we do. Everything. Which includes dating. As people of faith, we must work to honor God with our dating relationships. To lift it up as a Holy Sacrifice to Him. Which sounds great, but is easier said than done. Read below for some Godly #relationshipgoals.
God's Goals: Not an exhaustive list, but a great place to start.
1. Purity (1 Corinthians 6:18)
This is a struggle. Because we live in a culture that condones this and says it’s not a big deal. But, to honor God, we must FIGHT to remain pure. To stray away from all sexual relations and build our relationship on other, Godly things.
2. Empowering, supportive towards good things (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
Your relationship should support and encourage you. Any relationship in which you feel battered, depressed and a lack of self-esteem is unhealthy and not honoring to God. This goes for guys and girls.
3. Humble (Colossians 3:12)
Both partners must be willing to admit when they are wrong, acknowledge and grow from their mistakes. A humble relationship doesn’t let pride bog it down. It doesn’t act mad to get attention, it doesn’t not apologize when they should and so on.
In sum, relationships are tricky to navigate, but can be done if we cling to what God wants as opposed to what we or our peers think might work. If we all could base our relationships on these things we could avoid all of the heartbreak and strife that so often accompanies relationships. My prayer is that we date with our Lord's desires in mind, not our own. Amen.